Trauma Responses

There are many experiences that induce trauma. Trauma is often described as an emotional response to an event or series of events that is distressing and overwhelms the body’s ability to cope.

Neglect, abuse, violence, addiction, accidents and more can cause “big T” trauma, but “little t” trauma is just as impactful. “Little t” trauma often has to do with experiences that created emotional wounds surrounding worthiness, self-esteem, and more. Regardless of the type of trauma, the body and the mind react with protective parts aimed at survival. There are four main types of trauma responses: fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.

1. Fight response involves a readiness for confrontation when triggered or emotionally dysregulated. Your body perceives danger, so it begins to prepare to defend itself. Aggressive behavior, anger or rage, and willingness to engage in a threatening posture is often demonstrated. If you see your partner always willing to fight, to escalate, and to attack, this is one of their trauma responses.
2. Flight response is more about escaping from the body’s perceived danger. There is often an overwhelming need to run away or to escape into other things such as work, substances, people, etc. This response exacerbates anxiety and creates a busyness that can be unhealthy to avoid feeling or avoid dealing with concerns. It can look like restlessness, avoidance, or feeling trapped.
3. Freeze response is characterized by feeling paralyzed or stuck in the presence of danger. This causes a shut down and often dissociation due to feeling so powerless and overwhelmed. The signs are feeling numb and detached or inability to move or speak. If your partner shuts down and cannot talk in conflict, they may be in a freeze trauma response.
4. Fawn response is about people pleasing. It involves placating to avoid conflict. This is often present when someone has been exposed to prolong trauma as a coping skill. Lack of boundaries, over apologizing, loss of identity is usually seen in this response type as well. It is a survival mechanism that can lead to low self-worth and codependency.

Once you become aware of your trauma response, you can work on healing. While these are
natural protective reactions, it is important to develop healthier coping skills in times of conflict or
stress. Learning how to manage trauma responses can greatly improve your relational skills.

If you have a question you would like to ask or a topic to be addressed in next month’s article, please email jenn@pinkertonpsychotherapy.com. If you would like to schedule an individual appointment, please contact us at 713.800.6999 or www.pinkertonpsychotherapy.com.